"Normal"

I always wanted to be special.

I wanted to stand out as someone who lead a life that was considered unique or different.

In short, I was an idiot.

Knowing how to put a feeding tube into your infant is a pretty unique skill.

I think administering five different medications to a wiggly baby on a daily basis qualifies as a different lifestyle.

I used to get high off the feeling of standing out.

Now you'll find my most contented smile when something absolutely normal is happening, such as when I can bring my baby shopping with me.

When I walk down the stairs in our home carrying just a 17 lb baby, without an oxygen tank, a breathing monitor and the mars rover strapped on me, I can't help but grin and think, "This is the life."

So, here's a toast to normal! I raise my glass to mediocre, average and downright boring people everywhere! The closer I get to joining you, the more comfortable I feel.

I now strive for a medium sized house in the suburbs, a minivan, a dog, 2.5 children, and a rocking chair, where I can attempt to learn knitting for exactly 12 minutes, before deciding that small motor skills are over rated and I like reading better anyway.

Someday.

Until then, I've got to go thicken up some milk for my baby.

Love,
M.C.

The Choice

Hello and welcome to my shiny new blog! 

I am Mama Crazy, but you may call me M.C. I am married to an incredible man named Señor Guapo, or S.G.

Together we have a little man we call Happy Monkey, or H.M.

He wasn't always so happy and healthy, though. He was born almost 4 months early at only 1 lb 15 oz. He spent the first 105 days of his life in a neonatal intensive care, before we were able to bring him home. 

That experience dramatically changed my life. 

It was an incredibly difficult thing to go through. Thanks to my steadfast husband, a solid support system of family, and, above all else, a kind and loving Heavenly Father, I made it.

But, there was a very dark point where were not at all certain that we would be able to take H.M. home with us in this life. In that moment, I had a choice. I could choose unflinching faith and optimism, or I could choose to just stop living. It was a harder choice than it should have been.

That's where the title of this blog comes in. 

I chose joy.

I chose peace.

I chose hope.

I chose faith.

I chose laughter.

These are things I get to choose again daily,as we adjust to this new "normal". 

You have the same choice to make for yourself. 

I invite you to walk this road with me.

Love,
M.C.